Vulnerability is an Unusual Beast

What does vulnerability have to do with Love? Perhaps not a lot. Unless you consider this: when you can’t be vulnerable, you seriously inhibit your ability to sense and Love (both your self and others).

About Emotional Blockages

When emotionally blocked, we are caught in traps often of our own making. We are beyond authentic Love or empathy. We are beyond understanding for we can’t honestly “feel”.

The society I grew up in taught me to suppress my emotions and feelings. This has always grated my spirit, my heart and brought no end of misery (confusion, depression and low self-esteem).

Emotions and their “symptoms” – spiritual, psychological and physical – show us how well we are coping with what goes on within us. Symptoms are signals that there’s something much deeper inside that’s the issue e.g. as deep shocks or traumas. When blocked, buried or suppressed, these deeper issues manifest in patterns of ill-health.

By choosing to be curious, we can find out why some of these symptoms manifest. By paying attention to our symptoms with acceptance, Love, acknowledgement and respect, we find new well-being options for ourselves.

Being Kind to One’s Self

Charity begins at home. Our home. Our selves.

When we are authentic, we are real, sincere and secure in our own care, in our emotions, in our feelings. And, from this, we are Loving and kind to our selves.

Being secure, we can choose to be vulnerable. In being vulnerable, we truly register what others bring into our lives. We feel safe in what happens. Our vulnerability brings our sense, our Love and our authenticity to bear.

We are thus remarkable and bring difference into the world. By choosing vulnerability, we are the “magic” people need to experience in their lives. By choosing vulnerability, we are the difference and so support others and their needs.

Start Today: Start NOW

Being vulnerable takes only a choice to explore a broader and deeper life. If you didn’t feel there was more, you wouldn’t be looking for it, would you?

Now is always a good time to make different choices. Want to be more authentic and vulnerable and to truly make a difference? Then start with being the change.

Step one: Love your self and touch your life with Love

Step two: Love others.

It can really be that simple. Our worlds and lives are what we think they are. Choose different thinking and your life experience changes.

When you choose being vulnerable and taking that leap of faith to shift the blockages, your life will change!


I find I now appreciate. Often it’s the small things that get me started. Then I realise and value the larger ones, too.

I’ve often (intellectually) known, in life, if I wanted a better ride and to value what I experience, I need to be grateful. Somehow, I’ve always missed that bit.

As I’ve chosen to engage my passion of Communicating Love, my heart has opened. With my open heart, I appreciate:

  •       The warmth of Spring sunshine
  •       The cool of Spring air
  •       The Loving care my friends bring to me
  •       The Love my partner supports me with; her tireless and constant attention
  •       My Father, my Dad, goes further than any to help and aid me; he’s even done so through years of ingratitude on my side of the equation
  •       Trees in blossom
  •      Water flowing
  •      Plants that keep me company
  •      The beauty of Nature to heal with plants and when we allow Her to help
  •      Big-hearted, Loving people
  •      Wonder, the essence of connectedness
  •      Beauty of the spirit
  •      Stillness, silence and ease
  •      Wonder – when I am in awe of how amazing any thing can be, I am honest to who I am and unlimited in who I can be
  •      Opportunity; I can be what I wish
  •      Potential; unlimited potential
  •      Excitement; as I realise
  •      The love of cats and dogs
  •      How funny, Loving and kind and appreciative my grand-daughter can be
  •      Appreciation brings me everything – resilience, gratitude and resources to be authentic…

And, appreciation is just another word for Love.

Appreciation is Love in action: Love of my self and Love for how there’s beauty, how there’s kindness, how there’s human- and spiritual connection; how there’s Life and light everywhere. How, it’s always there when I choose to allow it to be in my Life.

And, what I love most about appreciation is the opportunity to practise it!!

Finding Hearts throughout My Life

For many years, I’ve been aware of finding hearts in all sorts of unexpected places. I just put it down to a quirk in my awareness. With time, I realised these hearts were messages to say I was Loved.

Places include:

  •  standing in a telephone box, looking down and seeing an elastic band on the ground in the shape of a heart;
  • when I went into the kitchen of a new flat, the washing up liquid spilled on the kitchen counter by the previous tenant was heart shaped;
  • another time, the puddle I looked at was heart shaped;
  • a leaf falling from a tree in Cornwall (do you know how rare they are?) with a heart-shaped hole in it landing on my head;
  • many more elastic bands, leaves and stones…

So many times, when I felt low, depressed, stressed, afraid, lonely or vulnerable, I often found hearts to remind me of Love even though, at the time, I didn’t accept or acknowledge it. I did notice the hearts. Funny how that is, heh?

I now live with a partner whose heart size is far, far, bigger than the size of her body. Wherever we’ve gone to on holiday, we’ve found hearts in streams, in a quarry, on beaches, and all over the place…

How I see this for me:

  • if I look and allow, I will have Love in my life;
  • if I accept my own Love, I will never be without;
  • if I accept God, the very essence of Love to be my Companion, I will always have Love and Light and value in my life;
  • no matter how dark certain times can be, there is always Light – there is always Light, there is always Love – there is only shadow when “some thing” has got in the way, in between…

My choices and decisions need to be about being in the Love not paying attention to the “some things” that may get in the way.

How about you? Go on, share your experiences, too?

Blessings, Benn

Roses: fine remedies for the heart

Known as the flower of Love, roses bring unique energy into the world where their shape, flavour, scent, texture and beauty embody the energy of the heart centre or chakra.

My perception of roses is that they resonate Love and bring a sense of beauty into any darkness of the soul.

Wherever roses grow and are appreciated, poets, lovers, artists and medicine and food makers recognise them for how they influence the human spirit towards warmth and Love.

What interests me, personally, is how roses bring health and benefit and joy to humans as:

  • rose flowers
  • rose water
  • rose jellies, jams and Turkish Delight
  • rose flowers as a tea
  • rose tincture
  • rose otto or attar (essential oil often used as one essence in perfumes)

I can’t emphasise enough, how much I attribute the vast majority of the healing benefits of roses are about the roses’ abilities to reach into the heart and feelings and to engage both Love and the heart chakra (see under Ayurveda notes below).

Roses are associated with so, so many health and healing properties, I only mention a few below involving using the leaves, flowers and hips (fruits). This is followed by the way rose flowers are used in Ayurveda

Here is a list of the health and healing benefits of using rose leaves and flowers (unless otherwise mentioned):

  • heart:
    • roses calm the heart, ease palpitations and help with feelings of a lack of love in one’s life;
  • immunity:
    • rose petal tea enhances immunity and helps prevent infections due to clearing away toxins and heat;
    • cooling fevers through clearing toxins and heat from the body;
  • inflammation:
    • rashes and inflammatory problems reduce due to cooling properties;
  • respiratory system:
    • rose petal tea helps relieve symptoms of colds and ‘flu, sore throats, runny noses and to clear bronchial congestion;
    • rose flowers or hips as syrup or infusion strengthen the lungs;
  • digestive tract:
    • rose petals fight digestive tract infection and aid re-balancing healthy bacterial levels after antibiotics or poor diet;
    • astringent properties from tannins helps reduce hyperacidity / overactivity that lead to excessive thirst, hunger and mouth ulcers;
    • rose infusion is useful for diarrhoea, enteritis and dysentery;
    • rose infusions can be used for mouthwashes (mouth ulcers or inflamed, bleeding gums) or as gargles for sore throats;
  • skin:
    •  rashes, eczema and acne respond to cooling qualities of roses when used internally and externally as teas and washes;
    • rose water is famed for clearing and cleaning the skin of rashes, acne, spots, boils and blemishes and for clearing wrinkles via toning, anti-inflammatory actions;
    • rose water or infusions help repair, and prevent infection of, minor cuts, to reduce swelling of bruises and strains;
  • nervous system and stress:
    • hips, flowers and essential oil all help lift the spirits and to restore nervous well-being; they also calm the nerves, relieve insomnia, lift depression, alleviate anxiety, dispel mental and physical fatigue (due to dampening of the spirit), soothe irritability, grief and anger;
    • rose water is used to bathe tired, sore or inflamed eyes;
  • reproductive system:
    • in females roses’ properties help to –
      • clear uterine congestion causing pain and heavy periods;
      • balance irregular periods;
      • aid infertility and increase the feminine principle;
      • clear emotional difficulties associated with frigidity, PMS and menopausal concerns;
      • deal with emotional concerns about sexuality insecurities and low confidence in or about loving, secure relationships;
      • and, rose infusions make an excellent douche for vaginal discharges;
    • in males, roses can help alleviate impotence;
  • urinary system:
    • roses are diuretic and help reduce both fluid and toxins via urination;
    • roses have been used to treat stones and gravel in the kidneys and bladder;
  • vitamin C – rose hips are one of nature’s richest source of  vitamin C (plus K, Bs and A) even when cooked and made into a syrup;
  • astringent properties:
    • tannins help repair tissues and alleviate bleeding in different parts of the body such as mouth, digestive system and bladder;
    • tannins also help dry phlegm and arrest discharges;
  • other aspects:
    • rose oil or ointment makes a good lipsalve;
    • rose infusion in wine or vinegar added to a bath relieves arthritis and rheumatism.

Roses in Ayurveda

Ayurveda, one of the oldest medicinal traditions in use today, reveres the rose petals for their ability to treat the heart, nerves and for their ability to lift the spirits.

Roses cool and rebalance all three doshas (the energies that make up the essence of the body and life) with an affinity for the blood, female reproductive tract, nerves and heart.

Rose properties and uses include:

  • awakening digestion;
  • improving the intellect;
  • reducing excessive menstrual bleeding;
  • clearing excessive uterine heat and so helping clear pain, endometriosis and fibroids;
  • aiding PMS/T relief;
  • cooling menopausal hot flashes (useful as a spray to cool instantly);
  • calming the spirit and nerves and any resultant headaches, low mood or anxiety;
  • opening the heart chakra so increasing patience, compassion and Love;
  • dealing with skin inflammation – eyelid inflammation, acne, eczema, psoriasis, urticaria, itching and irritation;
  • digestive ulcers, inflammation, acidity, heartburn and enteritis;
  • reduces diarrhoea due to heat excess;
  • reduces blood lipid levels;
  • calming the emotions associated with heart and Love and sexuality.

Acknowledgements to my author colleagues – thank you for your works!

– Anne McIntyre (The Complete Floral Healer) and

– Sebastian Pole (Ayurvedic Medicine: The Principles of Traditional Practice)

How to Understand the Importance of Acknowledgement

Have you ever noticed how you feel when:

  • someone actually listens to what you are saying?
  • someone shows so much interest in you that they stop what they are doing and actively pays attention to you?

Watch how others’ respond when you:

  • hold a door open;
  • give them flowers;
  • show courtesy;
  • stop and listen to their message;
  • smile at them and wish them good day?

The big things in life can often be the little things; simple “aware behaviour” that acknowledges another is one simple to “do.”

Please share your experiences and thoughts…

The Beauty of Love in Action (regardless)

Love, the driving force and very light of Life and the Universe, is the essence that forms the foundation of many an act of kindness and search for meaning in the world.

Acts of kindness are more than buying coffees or a drink for others; they are so very, very much, much more (is that enough emphasis?). They are the times when others or oneself chooses to be generous, kind or helpful to another when they have to be neither.

In my life, seeking to understand or to find comfort (despite, and often due to, my own torments) without me seeing them for what they were, I was “kinded” to, in a variety of ways:

  • Hardy, my aunt’s dog, was always happy to take me for a walk as a teenager sad and full of anxt; a grand and warm companion;
  • My Grandma treated me for eczema with Calendula flowers in my food and on my body, and with Love – she was often there just when I needed saving!
  • My other Grandma made the most remarkable soups and Elderflower champagne (yum!) and had me to stay during the holidays;
  • At different times, children and cats have adopted me, and my lap, for friendship;
  • One time a very Loving and kind Catholic priest listened to my problems and sent me books about my (then) passion;
  • My parents, at times too numerous to count, have helped me with Love through practical support, money, care and rescue;
  • My step-uncle took me under his wing and listened when no-one else ever seemed to do – his kindness showed I was both valued and important – it felt that unique, it brings tears to my eyes even now most of forty years later;
  • Countless mentors have been there with Love beyond the call – too many to mention: I’ve been blessed with personal accommodation and acceptance and acknowledgement just when I needed it, at times beyond count;
  • What touches me almost most is the Love and trust my grand-daughter has shown me from when we first met – she’s currently seven going on much older and I’m lucky to get great birthday cards, personally designed by her – her enthusiasm for life is priceless;
  • My plants – orchids, Jade (money plants), aloe veras, Peace Lily and Baby Orange Tree – will bloom, grow, forgive, blossom and flourish despite me; I’m honoured they remind me of Love in action as they reveal their beauty;
  • And, last though not least by any means, when I allow to, God for His acceptance, Love and regard for me as His child; I am lucky and occasionally grateful, too…

What is sad is I can forget all of the Love I’ve met because I’ve oft chosen a determined regret, shame, sadness and self-neglect. I’ve buried much of Life’s amazing in neglect, burying it into shadows, unvalued and unappreciated.

Now I make a new decisions and choices:

  • I choose to shine the light of Love to find the Love hidden by my self!
  • I choose to know the Love others’ invested in me;
  • I choose to value their input and
  • I choose to value both my Life and to share that value into the Universe, too…

What have you found Life-changing and how do you express it into the world?

Raw-ness and Real-ness; Being the Love

Some times in Life require us to break open and be raw in the emotions we feel.

At these times, real-ness, normally hidden below our fears, comes out and authenticity prevails.

Times when our lives change; times when we are no longer how we were and times of transition (life coming or going) are times we are free to celebrate. And, to be Loving.

Raw-ness is the language where our hearts can be and share authentically in a space uniquely placed to meet.

With love and blessings, Benn

The Answer is LOVE!

It’s sad how our fears can rule our lives.

We either live in fear or in Love. Each is very different.

Love is the answer to life’s problems and shadows what we need to be is Loving to our selves, our lives and our world.

By being Love our selves, we are free to be real and vital and authentic.

Love is authenticity and the True language of the heart and soul.

And this is why this site is green and pink, the colours of the heart chakra.

Enjoy the content, comment and share and be here in Love, too.

Blessings, Benn